It's me, Marissa here, blogging in class instead of paying attention. Again. Shocker, I know, I'm a graduate student and I'm not pencil in hand scribbling notes as fast as I can fretting over the exams, that you would think a typical MBA student would be doing. To be fair, it's an elective. My other classes are kinda kicking my rear but the kid in front of me is looking at cats, so yeah, I'm not too worried about it. And you're so busted dude.
Not going to lie, looking up cats on the internet is a fave past time of mine as well.
But even though it's Tuesday, it's kind of like my Thursday…because in 2 days I will be headed to Davis, CA!
OH YEAH! WOOHOO!
Too excited. Way too excited. So excited that I'm worried that if I talk about it too much, I'll jinx it so I'll leave it at that and talk about my trip when I get back.
So yeah, you're probs reading this because the title just screams "Marissa got herself into some hilarious trouble, let's find out what it was!".
It's true. The title. I am super awkward. I laugh at EVERYTHING because it's my go to, my security blanket. That includes in opportune moments. Like "oh why the sad face?" "Granny died" "…giggle, I'm sorry for your loss, giggle" "Why are you laughing, my granny died and you're laughing??" "Um sorry, giggle, I'm not laughing at you promise giggle giggle or your granny. giggle."
No that didn't happen but don't be surprised if it does.
So this is my life…
It's been super rainy in good ol' Carbondale. That saying "April showers brings May flowers" was totally made up by someone from Illinois. It rains every day. Not all day all the time no, that's too consistent. It will rain and I mean RAIN for 45 min, just torrential down pour, raining cats and dogs, flash flood warnings, etc. and then BOOM, it's over and sunny.
What the hell? What just happened? I thought it was the rain-pocalypse and then it decides to be beautiful outside? Southern Illinois weather is seriously bi-polar.
But what happens when it rains so much? These lovely things called puddles. Big ones. For as much rain as they get, draining and pot holes on the streets is seriously subpar. I'm driving to all my classes, no longer walking haven't walked all Spring Semester. But I do have to walk from the parking lot to my class.
So yesterday we had a big powerpoint presentation for my Global Marketing class. Supposed to last 45min long and you had to dress super professionally. Meaning suit up. Wear heels, blazer, makeup, jewelry, curled hair the full 9 yards.
I dress to the 9's. Not gonna lie, a business suit is probably my best outfit in my closet. Something about getting glammed up in a 'I run this show' way makes a girl feel good and confident. (Guys, if you all think we females dress to impress you, you're highly mistaken. We dress to impress other girls, to get those compliments on how our new heels inspire envy with your best friend, and how it boost our confidence like nothing else. If we wanted to dress for the males, we'd go around in bikinis, everywhere. Seriously though. If you want to feel good, dress good.)
But it's raining. Hard. And it just started but I don't have 45 minutes to wait for it to stop. So I take my heels off, roll up my slacks to my knees and put on my flats and my rain coat and run out into the rain.
I know I look ridiculous, but heels plus Marissa plus rain is a bad idea. Baddddd idea. I make it to class in one piece, damp but we're ok. Heels on, slacks unrolled and we're good.
My group does pretty well on our presentation. The prof is slinging us questions and bringing up points that are def not in the text but I'm firing answers right back. We did a powerpoint on the European Union. My Bachelor's Degree is in International Relations/Political Science, emphasis on Europe. I also have studied abroad in Europe. Twice. Hit me with your best shot dude, this topic is my jam. I may have come off as a little argumentative but all my points were valid and some things he said were straight up wrong and I called him out. In a professional way and with enough tact to allow him to save face but if you're going to interrupt me while I'm in front of the class, don't expect me to lay down and die.
We catered our presentation as well. Food makes people happy, and why not butter up our grader with food? No rules against it and it's an am class and everyone loved it. And by catered I mean bagels from Panera. (We're still college students, aka broke as a joke)
We finish, get up and leave and imagine that it's not raining this time. 45min is up. I take my heels off though still as it is wet and I'm not the best in heels, obvi. I walk to my car and RIGHT as I'm about to reach it, some jack wagon driving way too fast to be in a parking lot drives by me and hits a huge puddle next to the side walk I was walking on going into the parking lot. Full of water.
It was like the flipping movies, water sprayed all over me.
I was LIVID. Oh my god it was cold, and gross and muddy. My pink blazer was completely ruined, I looked like a drowned rat. My bag, hair, pants, shoes, heels in hand, everything soaked. I totally screamed and the girl stopped her car probably because of it.
"Are you serious?!? Are you FUQING serious???!!!???"
And then she meekly waved and sped off.
And then I laughed. I was so mad I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe. (read above about how it's my reaction to all emotions)
So picture drenched me standing on the side walk in my what used to be nice dress clothes laughing. Hysterically. Laughing so hard that I'm crying and I don't know if it's because I'm cold and mad and I so have to trash my beautiful clothes or if it's because I'm laughing too hard from being so angry.
Closest representation of what I looked like I could find
And then I went home.
Still mad but no longer laughing. Just cold and wet and super pissed. I get home and start walking to my apartment. It's like everyone and their mothers happens to get to my building right then and there.
My neighbors, complete strangers as I have never met them see me for the first time since I have moved in. And I'm the epitome of a mess. Cool.
"Whoa, rough day?"
"Yeah you could say that."
"Jeez…what happened?"
"Oh a car sprayed me after hitting a puddle. Ya know, the usual."
"Dang, sorry to hear that. Oh wait you got something in your hair…"
He proceeded to pull out a WORM from my hair.
A. WORM.
"Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god."
And I laugh.
"Oh hahaha thanks for getting that, ew hahah so gross, ha so I'm gonna go take a shower. Giggle"
"Ok"
I could have died. I ran off into my apartment. Seriously? My neighbor just pulled a worm from my hair. I run straight for the shower and see myself in the bathroom mirror.
Makeup was obvi not water proof, hair is a wreck, and it looks like I got ran over by a car not just sprayed with water.
This can't be real life. It just can't.
Poor kid runs into me and I look like that and have a worm in my hair?!?! And I started laughing like a crazy person?!? Atta girl, Marissa. Atta girl.
I'll never be able to look that guy in the eye again. I hope I never ever ever see him again.
So yeah. Hope that was suffice in giving you all some comedic relief.
To Be Continued!
No comments:
Post a Comment